When in a relationship with a switch, how do you decide when to switch? There are many methods for deciding when to swicth. I know people who swicth on specific days, people who decide spur of the moment by mood. Others who do it randomly by drawing cards. For me it seems to be a combination of random and semi scheduled. My favorite is a little red octopus massager that migrates from bedside table to bedside table. Whoever has it get's the spankings. This is something we use for fun. The person who is the spanker is the one who get's to move it. Since it seems that all true switches can't live without their spankings for very long t tends to migrate often. Now if it ends up anywhere else, then either of us is fair game for a spanking.
Spankings for both of us are a fun activity and not for discipline purposes. That however doesn't mean that the spankings cannot be a discipline scenerio. There are hard spankings and playful spankings. It seems I like the more stern toned spankings for home and the more relaxed one at parties. For me it is hard to get the same head space with someone I play with only rarely.
It is a wonderful thing if you are a switch to be able to find another person who you can switch with both ways. That is something that is difficult for many people to understand. When switching most people will only top or bottom with any given person. For many topping someone who they also bottom to, makes lose some of the power exchange that would be there if they only bottomed to them. That is the same the other way around as well. It can be embarrassing for someone who has been topping an individual to suddenly be the one getting the spanking from that same individual.
3 comments:
What a unique way of deciding who's getting spanked.
So far my boyfriend and I haven't any particular signal. It just seems to evolve from discussion, i.e. whoever feels toppy makes a comment suggesting that he or she is and if the other responds, well, the fun begins.
Nice to have a blog from a switch as they are few and far between.
My way is just like natty's. sometimes you just want a good spanking and sometimes, you want to make the other person unable to sit down for a while :)
I like the octopus massager idea. i kinda go through periods where i just want bruises and then i switch to periods where she is there for my will.
either way, lots of fun, great post
We do it both ways. Usually it is just based on who feels like getting spanked, but other times we use te octopus massager just to make it more interesting. I think he does it to see how long I can go without a spanking :)
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